Sunday, September 28, 2008
hmm.im really so sorry for your loss. it was a loss, wasn't it? i have nowhere to rant this without judgement so here i am. most times its like that anyway. they were much happier times, and when everything was so much simpler perhaps. i have been through both ends of that, so i empathize? -ish?things that are that great should work out. things that are that perfect should work out. maybe then it wasn't one of those two. and not with good-quality cameras, no doubt. that, or the idea. this ultimately has to be answered. i woke up this morning with a smile. well more a twitch of the lips, and slight opening of eyelids. but i would characterize that as a smile anyways. the bed was for once, level. the sun was to my right now instead of above my head, and there was no rush to get to the shower, to hurry to the bus, to walk some more, and try to make it in time. it was just the ability to be in bed, to know im wistful, and just to be was more enthralling than i would imagine. did i mention the weather's glorious? cold as fuck, but so sunny you'd never believe it.i have a list of things to patiently wait to do. in time. chronologically. i have many blessings to be thankful for. i have a lot of happiness now, and i wonder how long it would be before i learn to appreciate it. hopefully not the hard way. alas, one can only think.
<3 <3 <3
12:32
