Thursday, January 04, 2007
i had a dream
and in the dream he said her name was
aisyahshe must have been pretty, i cant remember
and theres so much haught in his voice
and something like anger
which i didnt understand
all i know is that i felt lost.
disturbed somewhat.
and then i dreamt i was in a mamak
it was all-greasy, all-noisy madness
exactly the way i love it
and they were making fresh
roti canaicanai-ing and flipping and making those soft sizzling sounds.
i wish, i wish.
and in yet another dream
i dreamt that i was doing a-levels
in malaysia
and somehow i was doing it back in
balik pulauwith sureen and co
strange thing is
i was already in
dublin at the time
so it was great and everything to be back
but at the same time
i wondered if i was doing the right thing
i remember seeing mama
and my homeroom with her
and mak telling me that she wants to see me in
two days or something
and then when i asked ayah
he sed we were only there to visit abg cu.
not to send me there.
aneh, bukan?
and today made me see
that whats
here is more often than not the more important thing
than whats
back homebecause us humans can only accept what we see
and it takes a great deal of strength
to see beyond that.
on a more physical note
i feel like going out
but
mak and
ayah are calling me today
so ptth
esok masih ada.
i am happier today
tra la la
i just dont want tobe weak anymore.
fullstop.
<3 <3 <3
14:29